It took a while for me to get used to having you in my life. You were a rather grumpy bugger, stubborn and headstrong, refusing to do half the things I asked. One unfortunate day, you decided to go into total meltdown, leaving me totally helpless in Burnside, not knowing what to do. After much attempt at revival, we were forced to get help for you. You were picked up and taken to somebody who knew your condition well. After a complete bypass operation several days later, you recovered well for a short period. Then only a few months later, you once again succumbed to more issues: you lost the ability to suck. You lost all motor function and you had to be revived several times. After several other total malfunctions, including several occasions where I thought it was the end of you, I finally thought we had gotten over the worst of your condition. But your age was against you, despite me always having faith in you.
On Friday, you succumbed to your age and your basic functions gave in for the final time. You were 28. You were definitely not the most attractive member of your peers - you had many physical disabilities and aesthetically, you were rather scarred from many bad experiences. But you had undeniable character. You were a total BEAST. As much grief as you gave me emotionally, financially and the inconveniences placed on me as a result of your ailing health, I will miss you.
RUST IN PEACE, Helga the beer guzzling wench. :)
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